you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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