Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
