please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
