You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
