im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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