Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize