About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You smell like stripper and shame
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
