Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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