I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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