What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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