White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
