you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
