I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You made out with two different species that night
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
