So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
