names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
