Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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