shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Porn is love you can see.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
