You're completely useless in the revolution.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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