i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
