Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
