she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
