Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
