man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
