I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
