2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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