Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
