we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
