are you so shy because you have an std?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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