oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
