The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
