I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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