I wannas sexs uuuuu
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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