Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
