I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
