i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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