Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Michael Bay diarrhea
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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