You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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