with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize