I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize