he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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