How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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