You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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