Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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