So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize