We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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