Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
there was a trapeze. enough said
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Randomize
