normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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