you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
