i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
