the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Randomize
