Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
