Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
